I am sharing my story to the world about being a single mom to twins. I want to show other moms that it can be done! Its the joy of having children that change everything. Yes, it might be tough at times, but there is always joy in every moment.
Make sure to have a support system. I had a doula, and four family friends that helped me through my pregnancy and labor. I have my mom to lean on.
I rely the most on my girls father, and my best friend. They mean the world to me. When I'm having a bad day I talk to them.
Another thing to keep in mind is music. Always listen to music. It helps takes your mind of the issue at hand, also it helps babies or toddlers to calm down. My girls love music. We dance in the living room. Its totally so much fun!
I struggled the first year. I thought how can I raise two little girls, and still have time to myself? I pushed on and made it through each day. If you look at the big picture and the future it gets kinda scary. One day at a time!! Look at it as one day at a time.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Reading to my girls
Today has been a very fun day! My girls love that I read to them. They pick 4 books for the bookcase and we sit on the floor. One girl on my left and one on my right. They point at pictures in the book and I proceed to tell them what the pictures are.
The girls are very close to learning to say the words themselves. They babble, but thats part of the learning experience!
I would have to say the hardest part, is when its nap time and my girls do not want to listen. I have hit the terrible two tantrums already and we are only sixteen months old. There is kicking, hitting, and crying on the ground. I just wish sometimes that I had their father to help when it gets to times like these. I hate to say no, but how will they learn that its not ok to kick, and hit?
The girls are very close to learning to say the words themselves. They babble, but thats part of the learning experience!
I would have to say the hardest part, is when its nap time and my girls do not want to listen. I have hit the terrible two tantrums already and we are only sixteen months old. There is kicking, hitting, and crying on the ground. I just wish sometimes that I had their father to help when it gets to times like these. I hate to say no, but how will they learn that its not ok to kick, and hit?
Monday, July 26, 2010
Struggles
Being a single mom with twin girls has it ups and downs. Its very rewarding being a mother. I cherish it everyday. I lean on my friends and family when times get tough.
Some of the ups are twins play with each other, until they get upset and do not want to be around each other anymore. We learn sign language, how to interact with each other and so much more. Its like having a little school! My girls have learned so much! My oldest knows 20 sign language words.
Some of the downs, is not having much alone time. I know having a family means sacrificing free time, and partying. But in reality its giving up your sense of self for the time being. I have learned how to balance my time. Its a balance that has taken me a year to figure out.
Some of the ups are twins play with each other, until they get upset and do not want to be around each other anymore. We learn sign language, how to interact with each other and so much more. Its like having a little school! My girls have learned so much! My oldest knows 20 sign language words.
Some of the downs, is not having much alone time. I know having a family means sacrificing free time, and partying. But in reality its giving up your sense of self for the time being. I have learned how to balance my time. Its a balance that has taken me a year to figure out.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
From the beginning continued
I laid on the bed and pushed as hard as I could for a half an hour during each contraction. By 5:30, I was dilated full. (ps. during the whole labor process, I didn't take an ounce of medicine!) I was send down to the operating room, cuz twins aren't born in the birthing rooms. My first girl was born at 5:45, and I helped my second girl out. She was 6 minutes behind at 5:51.
WELCOME TO THE WORLD NYURA AMOURE AND LILIA HONOUR!!!!!!!!! I'm so happy you came into my world. It will be a challenge, but I am willing to stand here and fight it with you. I moved down to my parents a week after they were born.
This is a test and will continue to be a test from god. He gave me two beautiful girls. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming like dora says to nemo.
The first year was the hardest. I relied on my parents for everything, they pay my bills, they bought me clothes, they made me meals, they did everything but nurse the girls. Raising twin girls on my own with assistance from my parents is a test of my patience, temper, and love.
I have learned a lot being a single mother. Not every want is ever going to come true, not every dream will come true, but if you can wish yourself the best life that you can give, you have made a difference in your child(ren's) life. I see it everyday. I wake up to smiles on my girls faces. I have learned that everyone will struggle in their own way. My struggle is to be the best mom that I can be.
My latest struggle is not finding a job in my career field. I decided that I should follow my passion. Photography and cooking. My health career in ECG's can wait. I live with my parent's currently, and now need to find the resources and assistance to move on and get my own place. My parents tell me everything takes patience, and you can't put the cart before the horse, your setting yourself up for failure. So I think to myself do I want to fail no? Do I want to live in my parent's place any longer? No. So the next best thing is go get a daytime cooking job. I also came up with a wonderful work from home job. Its in the starting process, can't give away my idea just yet!
Recently, I came up with this idea that I would like to work with other struggling single mothers. I want to be their support system, turns out though, I still need my own support system. I recommend any mother should join a mommy group. How can I support anyone else, when I sometimes cry myself to sleep? Its been over a year that I have lived at home, I can't just sit here and hope an opportunity presents itself on my doorstep, I have to go fight for it.
WELCOME TO THE WORLD NYURA AMOURE AND LILIA HONOUR!!!!!!!!! I'm so happy you came into my world. It will be a challenge, but I am willing to stand here and fight it with you. I moved down to my parents a week after they were born.
This is a test and will continue to be a test from god. He gave me two beautiful girls. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming like dora says to nemo.
The first year was the hardest. I relied on my parents for everything, they pay my bills, they bought me clothes, they made me meals, they did everything but nurse the girls. Raising twin girls on my own with assistance from my parents is a test of my patience, temper, and love.
I have learned a lot being a single mother. Not every want is ever going to come true, not every dream will come true, but if you can wish yourself the best life that you can give, you have made a difference in your child(ren's) life. I see it everyday. I wake up to smiles on my girls faces. I have learned that everyone will struggle in their own way. My struggle is to be the best mom that I can be.
My latest struggle is not finding a job in my career field. I decided that I should follow my passion. Photography and cooking. My health career in ECG's can wait. I live with my parent's currently, and now need to find the resources and assistance to move on and get my own place. My parents tell me everything takes patience, and you can't put the cart before the horse, your setting yourself up for failure. So I think to myself do I want to fail no? Do I want to live in my parent's place any longer? No. So the next best thing is go get a daytime cooking job. I also came up with a wonderful work from home job. Its in the starting process, can't give away my idea just yet!
Recently, I came up with this idea that I would like to work with other struggling single mothers. I want to be their support system, turns out though, I still need my own support system. I recommend any mother should join a mommy group. How can I support anyone else, when I sometimes cry myself to sleep? Its been over a year that I have lived at home, I can't just sit here and hope an opportunity presents itself on my doorstep, I have to go fight for it.
From the beginning
2008 was a bumpy year. I had just gotten out of a bad relationship, just finished school, and was looking forward to my new working life. I took the summer off to just enjoy the sights and sounds of being with friends, doing whatever I wanted. Turns out it would all change in a heartbeat.
In august, I decided that I needed to find a job. I found this little shop called Cold Fusion. It worked with Herbalife products. It was nice, but I have never been one to sell products. Well while I was there, I would get these spells of faintness, and ended up passing out one time. I was sent to the hospital and that's when they told me that I was pregnant. Right there, my life had just changed. Now what was I going to do? Should I abort? Should I carry it out? Should I adopt? I had questions going through my head constantly. I knew who the father was, and I told him. He wasn't very happy about it. We finally had decided that I would abort it. I made the appointment, but then I had this little voice in my head that said you can't, along with my dear best friend trying to get me to change my mind. I eventually did. I continued to work at Cold Fusion, made some very dear friends. They helped me through the beginning part, hooked me up with a very loving family, who were willing I wanted that choice to adopt.
At this time I was 4 months along. The loving Hovland family had taken me in as a member of their family. At one point I thought I had miscarried, and went to a free clinic and heard the heartbeat for the first time. I was heartbroken, I thought I had miscarried, but turns out I didn't. Now what do I do? I have a baby growing inside me. The next day, I went to the Ob-gyn clinic and had my first ultrasound. Guess what they found? I was having twins. Sure enough, I was still getting over the shock that I was pregnant, then thinking not pregnant, and then getting news that I was going to have twins.
I finally got up the courage to call my mom in December. At this time, I had been going to biweekly ultrasounds, been told I was having a high risk pregnancy, possibility of one of the babies not getting enough blood, umbilical cords twisted, the news was unending.
I knew the news was going to be a shock to my mom. I made sure she was sitting down. Then I told her I was pregnant. I was 5 months along.
The next 3 months flew by. I was asked to live in a little house that the Hovlands had fixed up, it was like my own oasis. It was very comforting. It was the winter time in Duluth Mn. Roads weren't that great, ice everywhere. Why would a pregnant lady live alone? Beats me but I did.
It came February, haven't had a single issue with the pregnancy. Everything was a breeze. I went to a doc appointment and found out that I was dilated 1 cm. The doc put me in the hospital, and gave me all kinds of shots. Two for lung growth, one for muscle relaxor, one to stop the contractions. Some how I knew I felt fine, no complications. I knew I wasn't going into preterm labor. It was awful what they did to me. I felt sick from all the drugs they had pumped into my system.
March 22, I was having my baby shower. Lane had set it all up, got everyone that knew about me and my twins to come over and enjoy this time with me. It was so grateful. It was excellent. I got tons of clothes. (turns out it was the best donation anyone had given to me) Later that day, I went to a birthday party. There was loud music, singers, and odd food. All of the sudden I didn't feel good, I was emotional. I went home that night, and by 3 in the morn I was having contractions. Then my water broke. I had a doula who had been helping me since after I contacted my mom. We called her, and asked her to meet us at the hospital. I knew that I would be having these girls sometime today.
Contractions were bad, but not horrible. I had a team of friends around me including my mom and my doula. Everyone shared my pain in the contractions. My mom has found it funny that I would have a contraction and then go back to texting on my phone. By 5 o clock, monday march 23 2009, I was ready to have the girls. My doc told me I wasn't ready yet. I was only dilated to 9 cm.
In august, I decided that I needed to find a job. I found this little shop called Cold Fusion. It worked with Herbalife products. It was nice, but I have never been one to sell products. Well while I was there, I would get these spells of faintness, and ended up passing out one time. I was sent to the hospital and that's when they told me that I was pregnant. Right there, my life had just changed. Now what was I going to do? Should I abort? Should I carry it out? Should I adopt? I had questions going through my head constantly. I knew who the father was, and I told him. He wasn't very happy about it. We finally had decided that I would abort it. I made the appointment, but then I had this little voice in my head that said you can't, along with my dear best friend trying to get me to change my mind. I eventually did. I continued to work at Cold Fusion, made some very dear friends. They helped me through the beginning part, hooked me up with a very loving family, who were willing I wanted that choice to adopt.
At this time I was 4 months along. The loving Hovland family had taken me in as a member of their family. At one point I thought I had miscarried, and went to a free clinic and heard the heartbeat for the first time. I was heartbroken, I thought I had miscarried, but turns out I didn't. Now what do I do? I have a baby growing inside me. The next day, I went to the Ob-gyn clinic and had my first ultrasound. Guess what they found? I was having twins. Sure enough, I was still getting over the shock that I was pregnant, then thinking not pregnant, and then getting news that I was going to have twins.
I finally got up the courage to call my mom in December. At this time, I had been going to biweekly ultrasounds, been told I was having a high risk pregnancy, possibility of one of the babies not getting enough blood, umbilical cords twisted, the news was unending.
I knew the news was going to be a shock to my mom. I made sure she was sitting down. Then I told her I was pregnant. I was 5 months along.
The next 3 months flew by. I was asked to live in a little house that the Hovlands had fixed up, it was like my own oasis. It was very comforting. It was the winter time in Duluth Mn. Roads weren't that great, ice everywhere. Why would a pregnant lady live alone? Beats me but I did.
It came February, haven't had a single issue with the pregnancy. Everything was a breeze. I went to a doc appointment and found out that I was dilated 1 cm. The doc put me in the hospital, and gave me all kinds of shots. Two for lung growth, one for muscle relaxor, one to stop the contractions. Some how I knew I felt fine, no complications. I knew I wasn't going into preterm labor. It was awful what they did to me. I felt sick from all the drugs they had pumped into my system.
March 22, I was having my baby shower. Lane had set it all up, got everyone that knew about me and my twins to come over and enjoy this time with me. It was so grateful. It was excellent. I got tons of clothes. (turns out it was the best donation anyone had given to me) Later that day, I went to a birthday party. There was loud music, singers, and odd food. All of the sudden I didn't feel good, I was emotional. I went home that night, and by 3 in the morn I was having contractions. Then my water broke. I had a doula who had been helping me since after I contacted my mom. We called her, and asked her to meet us at the hospital. I knew that I would be having these girls sometime today.
Contractions were bad, but not horrible. I had a team of friends around me including my mom and my doula. Everyone shared my pain in the contractions. My mom has found it funny that I would have a contraction and then go back to texting on my phone. By 5 o clock, monday march 23 2009, I was ready to have the girls. My doc told me I wasn't ready yet. I was only dilated to 9 cm.
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